auzzie_83

Random Outburst (aka "R.O")

2005-08-07T12:43:31Z

I might bake tomorow... and clean out the space for my new flat oh how joyous it shall be to rendezvous in a place of solitude and calming serenity....ok even im impressed by my word usage just then....where the crap did that come from? But i am excited to be having my own space and decorate it how i want. I feel like scrapbooking right now but i dont have my tools cos they are in america ....unfortunately. Ummmmmm i played poker friday night when we got back from the coast i got sunburnt wooo hooo my first sunburn since being home... yer poker was heaps fun i won overall it was soo funny and exciting good times. Good to still have those friends uve had for years and know that you will always have fun with them.

auzzie_83 @ 2005-07-30T18:36:00

2005-07-30T08:36:43Z

its all so quite on the live journal front....thought id do a random post to keep it living ok so now its dinner time then im going to socialize....wierd huh? i never in life socialize

auzzie_83 @ 2005-03-11T05:58:00

2005-03-10T19:59:10Z

I have decided i will keep this one alive, but i am going to do most of my postings on xana....cos i can, soo yer woot,, i am really really really bored wow

crossed over

2005-02-24T23:38:38Z

I have moved :D find me at the link below woot

http://www.xanga.com/auzzie_hibiscus

update...

2005-02-22T20:21:32Z

hey thurr,

Well whats to tell sat night hung out with my sweetness ashley and played some very muchly missed dance dance revolution, then chilled in the highlands cafe and met derycks parents, who are awesome, and then brad came and there was jennie and shelly and cat soo it was cool we played cards, and talked about memorys past. sunday i had a really good day, i kinda missed church like a bunch of people, but thats ok I wont go to hell. Went to lunch with heather, jennie, brian, and caleb and that was nice, then everyone but caleb decided to go to shake it which was really intresting when i have money to burn (when i quit buying stuff i dont need) I am going to buy some records to put up on the wall they looked really artsy and awesome. Umm yer then had devos with john, brian, andrew and heather which was cool scince i didnt go to church that day, its nice to talk about God and get convicted. Then i went out for mexican with andrew, john and brian and there was an abundance of refried beasn yuck!!! next time there will be no beans!!! but anyways it was nice, first time i have been the only girl in a while. Played some board games yesterady in the coffee shop and almost won scrabble almost!!! we have devos with out brother floor tonight i lovew our brother floor they rock. and thats what i have been up to thus far, b ible lands was actually intresting today. but i still fell asleep, ot poetry was good too. I dont have it at all next week score that means i have all of thursday off woot woot. I really want to go to a scerene place, or just i dont know get away for a day that would rock, i miss ddoing that with muh crew back home. So guys when i c ome back we have to go to Mt tambourine, for ol time sake. I miss it soo. Oh please if u get a chance pray for my aunt who has breast cancer, thanx.
I have been not focusing on myself and my problems lately and its been awesoem i am soo glad i dont focus on that crap anymore cos i am smiling and laughing and just feel much better about myslef soo woot to that. I havent had mail in like 3 weeks or more soo i shopped online, now ill feel loved HAHAA....im such a loser

iknfbna[x

2005-02-16T02:12:49Z

It was such a beautiful day to day, i spent some of it relaxing in the park it was awesome. i CANT WAIT FOR SPRING<3
Yayy. Ummm then i came down to the student center, and played fooseball with rob and won with and awesome shot that rebounded off the wall! woot. Then i played fooseball with Rob and 2 other guys i dont know there name, i know their faces, but names. Anyways it was alot of fun, then i had a really awesome convo with Andrew he is awesome i heart him! and now im just waiting for efveryone to get together to see SPANGLISH woooot wooooot for adamsandler whom is awesome. soo yer ive had an awesome day. I am really going to try and make an effort to not miss home so much, and not let things drag me down, i just want to be the happy person i know i am the one i was back home, so im going to not let things get to me anymore, maybey that means not letting emotions get in the way of anything i dont know, it will be hard though, but im gonna try it,umm yer valentines day was a lil depressing so im glad its over, he he. Crap im gonna be single forever, that sucks for me. I dont want to be with just anyone, i want the guy that respects women soo much, i want the one who i dont have to tell them to open my door, or will offer me the front seat. u know little things, that just let u know that hes respectful. and is sweet yer i dont wanna settle for anything less then, woot woot, thats my thought for the day, and i know Gods got someone awesome but somtimes u just think...yer im gonna be single all my life, that sucks, but i gotta get over that, or change wotever the crap it is that makes guys not likeme....i wish i knew what it was seriosuly, anyways im gonna shutup, im in a good mood and wanna stay that way one hundred piont seven cya later kids *hugz * mwah!!!

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

2005-02-12T08:52:46Z

Soo, im really really really really excited, cos i just found out that 4 of my awesome friends are rocking over to the states at the end of the year i luv them sooo much and cant wait we are gonna have the bestest time. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Um i wrote another song tonight...thats fun. I got my hair majorly lightened when the hairdresser screwed up today and wouldnt give me a refund...jerks. got my pottery back today too yay. Im so glad i found a church to do youth work at....and a totally rocking one by the sounds of it i cant wait to be a part of it all... God really planned the whole thing. major answer to prayer. Thank you God. its 4am wierd i should be asleep but im not. i had like a bunch of other stuff to say, but it would just make me mad and im just sooo happy right now bout my friends comeing over that i dont want to go into that...cos im hapy. I wish there were more australians here:( i need to recruit i think!!! anyways i luv u all bunches *hugz* mwah

Um a poem i wrote in my room today

2005-02-10T01:18:12Z

Sorry...

Im sorry that you gave me love
and I through it on the ground

Im sorry that your my best friend
when no one else is around

Im sorry that you forgive me
for every little thing

But I cant forgive my brothers
For my heart always aching

Im sorry that you held me tight
and I didnt let my light shine

Im sorry that you gave me a sunset
and i gave you 5 minutes of "my" time

Im sorry that I let you down
and Your treasures I completely waste

Im sorry that I made you cry
those tears fresh on your face

Im sorry Lord i hurt you
And that i probebly ruined your plan,

But mostly Lord im sorry
that I'll do these thigns all over again.

i am drinking a diet pepsi hows that for a title??

2005-02-09T20:32:50Z

So i whatched the notebook today, for the second time. cried like a baby at the end...then depressed myself, so all in all a great time. Anyways, i dont know what to journal about but thought i should update. I just dont wanna keep hearing about it every frikken things goshhhh (one person knows wot im talking about) its soo depressing please keep reminding me that i will be a loser forever. bleh. anyways i got to send some preszzies home for my mum dad, sis and nephew soo that will be nice, i just wish i could be there to give it to them. and a hug. my nephew is draing kircles (his word for circles) i cant believe how much he does now he just keeps on growing hes really smart, he dossent get that from me at all. random though....if u wore a wet suit in a thunder storm and got struck by lightning....would it affect u? moving along, im tired. v day is coming up swtupid piece of crap holiday thinks its soo smart! it should choke and die. untill i am not single....lol. anyways i wanna be closer to God i havent had time with him by myself in a while....i am a horrible person, christian, andd everything else. i suck the end.

eff.......

2005-02-06T08:52:17Z

so i went to cleveland today, and lake errie however u spell it, it made me miss home alot talking about home and stuff, reminiseing. So i get back already feeling crappy, and then it gets worse...thats all i will say it just wasnt a good night i went out with jennie and heather and its 4am now i just got back , but i had some time to cool off. I just want God to make it go away... i hate crying. So when people blow things outta proportion, it makes me mad. I know it will probebly be ok tomoro, but if this is gonna keep hapining then, well some things might have to change, and i dont want it to. I dont really know exactly what im typing right now. But yer im just kinda pouring out crap going through my head, cos somehow it just makes me feel a bit better. I miss what i had with God alot, things are looking better with him though and thats good im still not close as i use to be but im working at it, i get frustrated when i cant accomplish what i want to accomplish ya know. I wish i had my childhood back and i could do soo much stuff over and i wish i had started over college again, and undo my mistakes, but thats not going to happen either, eff anyway im just glad i had my heather tonight she is amazing and i love her, and im so glad we are friends. Anyway my head hurts, and i feel worn out, but im going to see rent tomoro, so it should be a good day i hope. I wish chee were here hopefully he will come over. I cant wait hes awesome. Anyway i think i might call it a night............... love u all *hugz* mwah

auzzie_83 @ 2005-02-03T17:04:00

2005-02-03T07:07:10Z

Today was an awesome day i had alot of fun, we went to silver screen then to see brian play at EKU, it was a great day cos i just loved hanging out with everyone, and im glad brian finally ot to play a set, he did awesome. Well i dont have alot to say, but i realised i have been very greatful lately, and i need to work on that. Ummmm yer i love u all *mwah

I got this qoute today in an email...
The question is asked,
"Is there anything more beautiful in life than a young couple
clasping hands and pure hearts in the path of marriage?
Can there be anything more beautiful than young love?"

And the answer is given.
"Yes, there is a more beautiful thing. It is the spectacle of
an old man and an old woman finishing their journey together on
that path. Their hands are gnarled, but still clasped; their
faces are seamed, but still radiant; their hearts are physically
bowed and tired, but still strong with love and devotion for one
another. Yes, there is a more beautiful thing than young love.
Old love."

~Author Unknown~

auzzie_83 @ 2005-02-02T22:59:00

2005-02-03T07:02:11Z

Today was awesome fun, a bunch of us went to silver screen, then to lexington to see brian play it was fun just hanging out with everyone. I just felt today was an all round good day, and i need to aprecate stuff more cos i havent been. Anyways i havent got alot to say but yer it was a good day. Love u all *mwah*
Got an email from a friend today with this sweet qote,

The question is asked,
"Is there anything more beautiful in life than a young couple
clasping hands and pure hearts in the path of marriage?
Can there be anything more beautiful than young love?"

And the answer is given.
"Yes, there is a more beautiful thing. It is the spectacle of
an old man and an old woman finishing their journey together on
that path. Their hands are gnarled, but still clasped; their
faces are seamed, but still radiant; their hearts are physically
bowed and tired, but still strong with love and devotion for one
another. Yes, there is a more beautiful thing than young love.
Old love."

~Author Unknown~

my appetite for loving is now my hunger pain

2005-02-02T05:24:41Z

so, um today was ok, i did some shopping wich always helps to make me happy i got some new shoes and stuff. Um went out to dinner as well with my old youth group leader and some other friends of mine. Umm yer but i dont know today was well i havent felt complete in a long while, i havent felt alot of things in a long while, its depressing, i dont exactly know what to do about it, i mean i spend time with God and everything, im just i miss how i use to be... I want to work out what makes me feel this way, what can make me feel beautiful, I want somthing that will keep the smile on my face again. I also miss having someone there for me, someone who knew somtimes better then i knew myself, even if they were a jerk, i still miss it. I think im crapping on im gonna go now cos doing somthing else is a good option... take care

auzzie_83 @ 2005-01-31T21:06:00

2005-02-01T02:04:53Z

Well , i am a lil bleh atm which sucks, i dont know if its pms or what but i hate being like this. Had my job interview today, that sucked. Umm and well just i dont know what to say, just thought id post, im gonna go now

auzzie_83 @ 2005-01-27T16:28:00

2005-01-27T05:41:36Z

Ive had an awesome last couple of days. Weve spent time worshipping, and chatting about God like everyday scince sunday i think so that rocks. Umm oh brian surprised me and cass with some roses and a really sweet card. hes awesome and totally made our year!Were blessed to have him in our lives. ummm i met a cool chick called shanon and been hanging out with heather heaps there both awesome girls yaay so another blessing to have them in muh life. We had open dorms tonight. It was cool to chill even though i wanted to be in bed asleep. But yer i think they should let us do it more than once a month its crappy. Ummm im going to clevveland for a day on the 5th i think or 7th...yer u all know i suck at memory crap. Umm besides all that.,...not much planing on going to florda for spring break,...hopefully that will all work out and we will have a rocking retreat and i can feel at home for alil bit. I still always think about my baby and his pictures are up infront of me. Hes soo cute i miss him alot. Well im gonna head off to bed my laundry is now done yaaay. Love you all!1 *hugz*

Born to try...

2005-01-23T08:32:03Z

Doing everything that I believe in
Going by the rules that I've been taught
More understanding of what's around me
And protected from the walls of love

All that you see is me
And all I truly believe

That I was born to try
I've learned to love
Be understanding
And believe in life
But you've got to make choices
Be wrong or right
Sometimes you've got to sacrifice the things you like

But I was born to try

No point in talking what you should have been
And regretting the things that went on
Life's full of mistakes, destinies and fate
Remove the clouds look at the bigger picture

fun times

2005-01-22T09:29:43Z

so, tonight rocked, brians show was canclled, suckkkk. So insted we went to whatch dvds in the student lounge, we met nathan who made friends with nathan who is a deaf guy and he taught us some rocking sign languge! lol it was soo much fun, then we came back chilled, cass and i read some bible passages and stuff that was cool, then went and played in teh snow at 4am with heather, brandym brian and cass it was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much freakin fun...i couldnt feel all of me, i was outside in pajamas but i will have that memory forever it was awsome it totally rocks that i have spontaneous crazy people who are muh style, yaaay! well i guess thats it for me, keep it real my loved ones! *hugz*

auzzie_83 @ 2005-01-22T10:56:00

2005-01-22T00:01:10Z

well im doing really crappy right now, my knee is painful, i think its a sledding injury it wont go straight. I didnt get the job, so i guess i wont be able to do anything forever. Umm so yer i feel really crappy, i just want to have things together in my life, i dont think its ever goin to get that way, why is it that some people get the great guy, the great job, the secure life, the comfort of knowing that things are great. and then u get some people, well who just dont ever get that. and that is my confusion. I wait patiently i rpay i wait patiently i pray....nothing changes

sooo good

2005-01-21T04:56:03Z

Hey kids,

well today was full of good times!< I had class, then interview, which went well cos i wasnt nervous, then to the gym wit heather,cass and brian then back here. we were spose to whatch a dvd but i was whatching the funness that was sledding outside, and i had to give it a try, it was awesome, and i didnt die, or brake anything which is a bonus. Then tonight we had hot chocolate and tim tams. And now im ready to pass out but cant cos im waiting for clothes to dry. Anyways i called my mum tonight that was cool talking to her and seeing she was alive. Umm tomoro got class but imm done at 12, then going to see brian and janene play at night so it shall be all good times, ummm thats the end of my story. So keep safe on the roads i know a bunch of u had lil accidents and im glad ur all safe. Be good to ur mothers. Love you all *hugz* peace

auzzie_83 @ 2005-01-20T12:21:00

2005-01-20T01:22:27Z

no one gives a ...
I know i cant be, but i wanna be home right now

sad face

2005-01-19T03:58:31Z

well im feeling kinda down right now, i dont know how this keeps happining, i think satan really attacks me this way and it fully sucks he knows how to keep me from giving it my best. Just once i want to feel like i have it all together like nothing is missing, like ive gotten all i ever wanted...and thats not alot, even if it gets taken away from me i dont care, i just want to feel what its like. I want to sleep, i want to cry, i want to speak to my mum...just hearing her voice somehom just always makes me feel a great deal better..she sent me an email talking about my nephew, and it made me cry and i wish she hadnt sent it but heres what it says...
Did I tell you that when they were moving out on the week-end, they opened
the door to your old room and Braiden got all excited and raced in - we
think he thought you'd been in there the whole time. He was saying
Nata-lata-latalie over and over. We just cracked up. He couldn't find you
anywhere.
breaks my heart...and im done

blah blah blah

2005-01-17T08:48:06Z

well, the last couple days have been just a great time hanging out with my people i missed alot over break. I feel so blessed that God has put such amazing people in my life, who i know will always be there for me and i dont ever have to feel alone. I cant say im looking forward to classes, cos im gonna have to wrok my but off, i just hope after i rearrage me schedual that it looks better then it does right now. If i could just g et my frikken pin man its been a pain in the buttocks. Man i really need a jobn, please if u get a moment pray about that. Somtimes i wish i had the ability to take away the hurt people have, but i know that i wont ever be able to do it, so the best thing i can do is just be there for them, and listen. Ipray this semester will be alot more fruitfull then the last. tomoro night should be fun. Im looking forward to hangin out and listen to some people rock out and just chattin wit everyone. I cant wait to see how God will use me this semester. I just need to meet him half way and quit being so slack. I was just in the bathroom washing my face and stuff wit cass, and we were talking about our pores, and just all the little inperfections we notice about ourselves, and how it sucks because like were so worried about all this little stuff that no one else would even notice, and girls are so bad about doing that but we cant help it u know, but i just wish we did not have to concerned about it. I feel shallow thinking the way i do.well im kinda rambling right now so i guess ima call it quits. I love u all! *hugz*

i love this song....

2005-01-14T08:53:02Z

MISSY HIGGINS LYRICS

Scar

He left a card, a bar of soap and a scrubbing brush next to a note
That said "use these down to your bones"
And before I knew I had shiny skin and it felt easy being clean like him
I thought "this one knows better than I do"

A triangle trying to squeeze through a circle
He tried to cut me so I'd fit

And doesn't that sound familiar? Doesn't that hit too close to home?
Doesn't that make you shiver; the way things could've gone?
And doesn't it feel peculiar when everyone wants a little more?
And so that I do remember to never go that far,
Could you leave me with a scar?

So the next one came with a bag of treats, she smelled like sugar and
spoke like the sea
And she told me don't trust them, trust me
Then she pulled at my stitches one by one, looked at my insides clicking
her tongue and said
"This will all have to come undone"

A triangle trying to squeeze through a circle
She tried to cut me so I'd fit

And doesn't that sound familiar? Doesn't that hit too close to home?
Doesn't that make you shiver; the way things could have gone?
And doesn't it feel peculiar when everyone wants a little more?
And so that I do remember to never go that far,
Could you leave me with a scar?

I think I realized just in time, although my old self was hard to find
You bathe me in your finest wine but I'll never give you mine
'Cos I'm a little bit tired of feeling like I'll be the bad fruit nobody buys
Tell me, did you think we'd all dream the same?

And doesn't that sound familiar? Doesn't that hit too close to home?
Doesn't that make you shiver; the way things could have gone?
And doesn't it feel peculiar when everyone wants a little more?
And so that I do remember to never go that far,
Could you leave me with a scar?
Could you leave me with a scar?

auzzie_83 @ 2005-01-14T19:37:00

2005-01-14T08:37:56Z

Naughty Girl by Beyonce

"Tonight I'll be your naughty girl
I'm callin all my girls
We're gonna turn this party out
I know you want my body"

2004 was your year! You felt sexy as hell - and it showed.

What 2004 Hit Song Are You?

ok that was gay! im not a hoe gosh

My Upmost for His Highest...

2005-01-12T03:06:01Z

"Everyone who asks recieves..." Luke11:10

Ask if you have not recieved.
There is nothing more difficult than asking. We will have yearnings and desires for certain things, and even suffer as a result of their going unfulfilled, but not until we are at the limit of desperationwill we ask. It is the sense of not being spiritually real that causes us to ask. Have you ever asked out of the depths of your total insufficiency and poverty? " If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God..."james 1:15, but be sure that you do lack wisdom before you ask. You cannot bring yourself to the point of spiritual reality anytime you choose. The best thing to do, once you realize you are not spiritually real, is to ask God for the Holy Spirit, basing your request on the promise of Jesus Christ(see luke 11:13). The holy Spirit is the one who makes everything Jesus did for you real in your life.

"Everyone who asks recives..." This does not mean that you will not et if you do ot ask, but it means that until you come to the point of asking, you will not receive from God (see matt 5:45).To be able to recieve means tha you have to come into the realtionship of a child of God, and then you commprehend and appreceate mentally, morally and with spiritual understanding, that these things come from God.

"If any of you lacks wisdome..." If you realize that you are lacking, it is because you have come to contact with spiritual reality- do not put the blinders of reason on again. The word ask actually means 'BEG". Some people are poor enough to be intrested in their poverty, and some of us are poor enough spiritually to show our interest. Yet we willnever recieve if we ask with a certain result in mind, because we are asking out of our lust, not out of our poverty. He is not ashamed to beg- blessed are the paupers in spirit (see matt 5:3)